by Baeth Davis, Your “Love & Money On Purpose” Mentor 

My mum has crooked little fingers. So did her mother – my beloved grandmother who we called “Grammy.” Writing this article on Mother’s Day, I’m pondering the inheritances from my mothers. Curiously, this marker showed up on both hands of my mum, my grammy and me.

Crooked little fingers, the kind that bend in toward the other fingers or lean in toward the palm, indicate trust issues. Sometimes these trust issues can cause a person to isolate from intimate contact or try to control situations and people to keep their anxiety at bay.

Nearly 13 years ago, when I became aware of my trust issues, I started holding my little fingers alternately, and when I did, I would remind myself to trust myself and trust life. I also reminded myself to speak up more often and communicate my real inner truth, not just what I thought would be pleasing.

Over time, my little fingers straightened. A straight little finger indicates a straight shooter – someone who says what they mean and means what they say. A crooked little finger can indicate stuffing of feelings, people-pleasing and intimacy shortages in one’s romantic life.

Fingers can grow, straighten and heal. Fingers can also become crooked, shorter or broken. The choice, as always, is yours.

Your Purpose Mentor’s Challenge: What needs healing in your life right now? Make a list. Then look at your hands. Does anything seem odd? Crooked fingers, arthritis, injuries, scars? Make a note of them. Do any of these hand oddities relate to current issues in your life? You might be surprised by the connections you make!

Do you feel free all the time? As in, free to express your feelings, your point of view, your creativity, your sexuality, your spiritual truth?

Freedom isn’t about doing what you want whenever you want; freedom is about the discipline to do what you truly desire, for your highest good, whenever you want. It’s a subtle but important difference. Indulgence is good once in a while, too much often leads to an early grave. Sacrifice is good once in a while, too much, and you burn out and crumble to heap of martyred dust. Basically, ongoing imbalance crushes your soul, along with your motivation, vision and passion.

Today, I’d like to share 3 simple steps I’ve discovered to spiritual freedom (there are many more of course). While I sometimes feel trapped by my own inner head trash, most of the time I find the journey curious, exciting and expansive. I feel free and say ‘thank you’ every day that I can say and FEEL my freedom. Freedom, as we well know from history, is a human right, but often claimed at a great price. By developing inner freedom, I do believe freedom can be available to everyone in our lifetime.

Step #1: Release Leading From Ego and Lead From Your Inner Guidance

I am committed to healing the rift of the receptive and active parts of my soul. I believe that by healing the fissures internally, my outer actions reflect the best of what I have to give. (When my actions don’t lead to more joy, I know it’s another lesson showing up for my soul’s education!)

What do I mean by ‘receptive’ and ‘active?’

Receptivity is listening to my inner guidance, hearing the voice that says “yes,” “no,” and “maybe.” Receptivity often means doing the opposite of what the majority do, as the majority are often motivated by fear.

Activity is the action I take outwardly toward my goals.

If you are online at all in the business world, there is still a split: “Heart-Based Marketing” vs. “Pull Up Your Knickers and Quit Your Whining Marketing.” It’s often hilarious, sometimes frightening and always attention-getting. The thing is, it’s just not how things work. If you want to do things ‘old world style’ as in going after your goals at the expense of other important areas of your life, you may get rich, but you’ll probably die of a heart attack or stroke trying. If you just pull angel cards and spin your pendulum but don’t learn how to make an effective sales call (or pony up and hire a pro sales person to make the calls for you), you’ll be a very evolved and attuned pauper.

Perhaps knowing your own heart and soul and taking brave action on behalf of what is true for you creates real freedom. You may be acknowledged or scorned for taking the alternative path, but what does it matter? If you are free, you are likely happy most of the time.

Step #2: Practice Emotional Mastery

Unconditional love is the outcome of emotional mastery. It is both my blessing and my curse. I am able to love humanity but am challenged in letting one person get really close to me. In admitting my fear of the loss of love (I’m in the School of Love according to my 9.5 loop fingerprints), I recognized that receiving love to the degree that I give love sets me up for inevitable loss. I ‘know’ that we all ‘know’ that endings are part of life – due to completed agreements, divorce, abandonment, and death. But every loss hits me like a ton of bricks, it has yet to get easier in this lifetime for me!

Recently, I became aware that the mere thought of allowing in that much love and then losing that love was a fear worse than death. It felt like annihilation, as if my body would explode into dust and become one with the Universe. My dance mentor, Vinn Marti, challenged me to explode – and live.

What is your worst fear? Are you willing to take it on – internally – and feel it, so your outer actions can move you through it?

For myself, I am finding that the ability to receive love expands the more I love and accept all parts of myself, especially the parts I judge. I’ve discovered I have the most judgment around my anger and my guilt. Most of the other emotions, even shame, are okay for me to acknowledge, feel and express. I am aware that releasing my anger and guilt in appropriate and cathartic ways will enable me to allow in more love. Meantime, people keep showing up to piss me off and expand my guilt capacity. I am aware this will continue to happen until I fully own my own feelings and let it be okay to FEEL them!

Also, as I’ve been doing this, I’ve noticed other people around me who are desperately out of touch with their own anger referring to my attempts at emotional honesty as therapeutic b.s. It hurts to be made fun of when I’m attempting, awkwardly, ineptly, to grow my heart capacity, but I have to remember that these folks are just mirroring my own internal judgment. As I grow in my self-acceptance, I will stop caring when people pelt me with rotten tomatoes or it will just stop happening. I’ve also stepped on some toes and hurt some feelings mismanaging my anger – which creates enormous guilt for me. Arrggghhhh… can you relate to this vicious circle? I finally get what ‘vicious circle’ means!

Step #3: Be A Goof Ball

I’ve found that wearing bright colors, dancing anywhere, anytime, and eating chocolate cake for breakfast (or a dinner appetizer) when I feel like it, brings me joy. I also enjoy hiking and talking to the plants and animals I see along the way, making up silly songs and singing them terribly off-key (by myself!), talking to imaginary friends in my car, visualizing dinner parties with 12 of my favorite notable people, and calling people randomly from my contact list just to say hello and find out what is bringing my friend either joy or hell and giving them a space to share their stories.

Sometimes I call people and ask them if they’ll hold the space for my ramblings. I figure things out by talking much faster than by thinking, writing or meditating. Most of my mentors in the past two decades have occasionally laughed at the end of a call, saying, “Well, Baeth, not sure I was much help today but you solved your problems once again.” I assure them I am paying them to listen to me. My business manager can only take so much… being my therapist isn’t in her official job description… but it ought to be!

By just letting it out and attempting vulnerability again and again, my courage grows along with my sense of humor! I sometimes get whacked, but I’ll just keep bringing soul’s truth forward.

One bonus tip: I now check in before sharing my spiritual truth by asking myself, “Am I emotionally safe here?” If not, I pipe down and seek out a better environment before putting my heart in my hands and offering it to others.

Your Purpose Mentor’s Challenge: What makes you feel truly free? I invite you to make a list of the habits, behaviors, activities, and people who contribute to your freedom in all areas of your life. What would you have to release to allow yourself full expression?

Last issue, we explored the major lines in Whitney’s left hand. The lines in her hand reveal she had great stamina, a large appetite for life, a powerful, decisive mind and an independent romantic nature. She was her own boss.

Today, let’s look at some other indicators. Let’s begin with her fingers. Notice that her ring finger is longer than her index finger and the base of her thumb on the palm, the Mount of Venus, is large. When you have a long ring finger (relative to the index finger) and a large Mount of Venus, you have the combination of the beautiful starlet. Whitney was certainly that for most of her life – gorgeous, well groomed, sexy, charismatic and entertaining.

Also, her index finger is leaning away a bit from her thumb. This indicates the proverbial “shooting one’s self in the foot.” You get so very close to a success and then stumble. For Whitney, this happened on a life scale. The autopsy report isn’t out yet, but I find suicide unlikely. Whitney had a self-destructive streak due to the misuse of her power as indicated by her leaning-away index finger. Typically, this type of person is not trying to do themselves in, but second-guesses themselves at clutch moments.

Notice her ring finger leaning into her middle finger. This broadcasts, “How am I doing? Am I doing okay? How am I coming across? Do I look alright?” It’s a sign of insecurity around one’s image and is often seen in the hands of creative performing artists. This self-consciousness can reach epic proportions as we saw with Michael Jackson and still see with Joan River’s adventures in plastic surgery. I wish big stars had it in their contract to have someone by their side who could say, “Are you sure you want to do that? Is that for your highest good?”

What’s ironic is her little finger leans away from the other fingers, indicating independence of thought. So even though she asked, “How am I doing?” it’s unlikely she’d listen to the answer unless it matched her own opinions and conclusions. The only advice she probably took was her own.

Notice how the middle zone of Whitney’s ring finger looks like it has a waist on it, as if a tourniquet is pulling it in tight. This is known as the ‘ugly duckling’ indicator, which may have caused the ring finger to lean toward the middle finger looking for feedback. Whitney likely felt ugly and awkward as a teenager and never quite got over it. I have this in my hands and no matter how many times someone tells me I’m attractive, that ugly duckling is never totally sure. I was an ugly duckling and was picked on, beaten up and tormented for my geeky appearance. It was awful – but it helped me be compassionate to those who suffer, that’s for sure!

Additionally, the upper zone of her index finger is small relative to the other two zones of the finger, indicating that herideals probably weren’t high enough for her skill set. I suspect if she was on a mission to save the world in some way, she might have taken better care of herself. She appears to have underestimated her own power to a serious degree.

Whitney Houston appears to be a case of profound power and talent undone by her own insecurities. As I said, it would have been gorgeous if she could have attended her stunningly creative, star-packed funeral before she died.

In response to this idea of a living wake, our subscriber and client, Ankya Klay, writes, “Even though we knew the situation, many of us, including me, were completely shocked by the frankness of this invitation. None of us had experienced such an event before. I watched my own process around this… denial and disbelief… and wanting to run away from the situation as far as I could. I didn’t know how to be with this. Truth was none of us did nor did Lakshmi. We just surrendered into the adventure and allowed the discovery of sharing the truth of our dear Sister’s imminent passing collectively.

It was life-changing. 60 or more of us from all over Australia, who had journeyed with Lakshmi in many different ways, but always in the quest for truth, gathered for a three-day Ceremony and Celebration of her life at a beautiful remote retreat in the National Forest. A teepee was erected on the grounds where most of the ceremonies would take place and for the first 24 hours, there was a roster of people drumming the big drum without cease, all through the night – drumming the heartbeat of life.

We shared stories, we shared our grief, we ate yummy food, and we laughed, cried and danced together for three days. It was truly transformational and cathartic for us all.

I will never be the same again. Lakshmi has given us permission to face death full on – not to waste a minute and to celebrate this incredible gift that this life is.

Lakshmi’s last gift to us was to bring us all together in Truth… for what greater and deeper truth is there than to acknowledge that each one of us will one day cross over to the other side – to the spirit realm. The truth we each try to hide and deny ourselves… but the accepting and meeting of which can transform our life and our livingness forever.

Lakshmi, in red tee-shirt, dancing one of her final dances.
Notice the light orbs filling the room

Lakshmi, already in a wheelchair most of the time, wanted to have one last dance. She loves dancing – all forms of dance – and had been a much loved dance teacher for many years. So, on the Saturday night, she organized a 70s disco – all the old favorites from back then, and we danced, danced, danced our souls and bodies out… and she did the best to do so too. You can see in the photo Lakshmi in red, covered by Orbs of light, especially on the heart of her tee-shirt. She created a space of pure joy for us all!”

Your Purpose Mentor’s Challenge: This year, for your birthday, consider holding a three-day celebration of your life. What would that do to your self-concept? What would that do for those who love you?

Whitney Houston’s left hand speaks a thousand words. Let’s take a look. (I have not been able to determine if she was predominantly left or right handed.) 

Angle of Opposition. Notice the nearly 90-degree angle between her thumb and index finger. The fingers “oppose” each other at a wide angle. A wide angle, like Whitney’s, indicates she needed a large territory to rule over and a big, worldly career. She was the queen of her dominion in every respect. A small angle of opposition means the person wants less responsibility and less to manage. 

Thumb set. A low-set thumb comes off the hand closer to the wrist. Notice that Whitney’s thumb is higher set, coming off the hand further up from the wrist. A “high-set” thumb indicates that more work and tenacity is required to get results than if you possess a low-set thumb. And while Whitney managed a large territory in the music business (indicated by her wide angle of opposition), results did not necessarily come easily to her. She made things look easy. Her success is as much the result of her determination as her innate abilities. 

Life Line. Let’s debunk the life line myth! Your life line does not indicate the length of your life! Whitney’s life line is – sadly – proof of that. It is strong, well-marked and encircles the mount of Mars and mount of Venus (the two areas that the thumb initiates from). If it indicated length of life, Whitney would still be alive. 

Your life line indicates your innate stamina level, work ethic and family issues. Whitney’s life line shows she was physically strong with great stamina and a supportive family. What it cannot account for is that she probably lived longer than a weaker person would have, given her substance abuse problems. 

A strong life line can be a blessing or a curse. A blessing for someone athletic and committed to good health, but dangerous for someone who doesn’t know their own limits. I suspect due to Whitney’s incredible power and stamina, she was able to party to extreme lengths and recover quickly. Unfortunately, it caught up with her and she wasn’t given much warning. (I don’t know this as fact, but my sense is that she was not suicidal. More likely, her body just gave out, much like in the cases of Michael Jackson and Amy Winehouse. All three of these great talents knew they needed to pull it together and get clean, but they were not supervised by addiction specialists. It is very dangerous to attempt chemical withdrawal without medical support as it shocks the system and can lead to an untimely death, the very thing these beautiful souls seemed to be determined to avoid.) More physically sensitive people might be set back by a food allergy, never mind a drug binge. Ah, the paradox of strength. Good when used for good, not good when used for over-indulgence. The strong hit the wall harder as they are less resilient than those with a highly sensitive, delicate constitution. 

Head Line. Whitney’s head line starts at the life line initiation point and terminates under her ring finger. It is an average head line. She thought things through, but not obsessively. Also the line is clean and without breaks, indicating Whitney was solid and practical in her thinking as well as able to come to a decision without a lot of angst. 

Heart Line. This is the major horizontal line on the palm, closest to the fingers. Whitney’s heart line begins under her little finger and stops under her middle finger. She possesses an “Earth” heart line, indicating a strong work ethic, loyalty, and a non-negotiable need for freedom. Pamelah Landers, Master Hand Analyst, calls this heart line the “Hermit.” The Hermit needs time alone to contemplate and regroup each day. The Hermit recharges through solitude. I can’t imagine fame was a comfortable path for Whitney. She likely found it exhausting and may have retreated into her indulgences to escape the constant scrutiny fame brings with it.

Whitney may have tried to conform to societal relationship expectations, but I suspect her idea of love wasn’t traditional. Most owners of Earth heart lines value loyalty and family, but on their own terms. It needs to match their definition of integrity, rather than someone else’s.

Whitney’s love life was complicated – and completely hers. No one was going to tell her who to love or how to love. She attempted to control her public image. I can’t imagine how uncomfortable it must have been for her to be on that reality show with Bobby Brown and have her dirty laundry hung out for all to see. Ah, the consequences of too much exposure. For a Hermit, who values their privacy and integrity, it can be excruciating and humiliating.

There is much more in Whitney’s hand to explore that I will share with you in our next issue.

Meantime, may you cherish who you are – your talents, your loved ones, your life. It is brief, no matter how long you live. May you live it with self-regard, self-care and self-love. There is nothing more important that YOU. Whitney’s glorious life and sad demise is a reminder to us all to give that face in the mirror all the love you’ve got and then, ever more love!

Much has been written about happiness, and yet, in my observation of Western society, so few seem to exhibit even a glimmer of joy. The eyes lack sparkle.

If all the grumpy Gus’s and their neuroses got shipped off to India or Africa for a month with nothing but the clothes on their back and the change in their pocket, given only the commandment, “serve others,” they would−most of them (not all!)−return humbled and grateful. They might say, “I have no problems of any significance. It is my privilege to serve and give the best of what I’ve got.”

I’m not suggesting you suppress your feelings and fake a smile, nor deny serious issues requiring your attention. If anything, I am encouraging you to go deeply into those problems with a renewed attitude of enthusiasm and either find a solution or move on to something you can actually do something about it in a meaningful way.

It may be naïve, but perhaps you might try out what I offer here. My suggestions come solely from my own life experiences and my desire to alleviate your suffering. I feel physical pain in my heart when I see people suffering. Sadly, nearly ALL the pain I see is self-inflicted due to fear, cowardice, self-judgment, blame, denial, rationalization, justification, explanation… need I go on? I am myself a recovering neurotic who has had to relinquish sloth, gluttony and an unearned sense of entitlement to find happiness.

My awakening to the power of happiness started with a four-month journey to India and Nepal in 1995. Suffice to say (I’ll tell the whole sordid story in my upcoming book!), it was not what I expected. The land of spiritual harmony I’d created in my imagination was instead controlled chaos, populated with over a billion people, debris and trash everywhere, dogs, rats and cows openly roaming the streets, beggars amputated by pimps to elicit sympathy in a bid for bigger donations, homeless dirty children and dead people awaiting their final fiery float down the Ganges. And magic. Life and death dancing together with no regard for propriety or making people feel better about themselves. The children were almost always smiling unless they were hungry or sick. There was happiness in this wildness. That was a clue.

Arriving home, I kissed the ground with gratitude for my abundant life of love, education and incredible freedom to express. I promptly fell into a spiritual crisis of meaning. Why was I here? Feelings of suicide set in; apparently a very normal part of accepting that life asks nothing of us and owes us nothing−life reflects the meaning we give it, nothing more, nothing less. Clue number two.

Calling a friend late one night in dire straits, lost and panicked, she said, “Baeth, why don’t you just pray?”Surrender. Clue number three.

I did pray. This was my prayer: “God, Universe, whatever is out there, if you will show my life’s purpose, I will forever be your humble servant. I will go where you ask me to go and do what you ask me to do.”

Two weeks later, I had my hands read. I was told, “Baeth, your life purpose is essentially ‘love.’ Kind of like Jesus taught. You have a special message about unconditional love for the masses.” Oh, Lord, I thought. No responsibility there! It freaked me out and excited me all at once, tears streaming down my cheeks. I truly despised my abusive experiences at the hands of nuns and yet, figured this irony was perfect in its creepy oddness. I always prided myself on being the ‘weird one.’ I mean, seriously, “Christ consciousness?” I didn’t know whether to laugh or throw up, but it felt alright, a-okay. At least I had a direction. And loving people was something that always came easily to me. I was much harder on myself than anyone around me.

Jump to today. I call my life purpose, “Spiritual Teacher in the Business of Love in the Spotlight.”Sometimes I just hold the space to unconditionally love my clients, at other times, I teach about relationship skills and at other times, I teach about creating a business you love. What I am certain of is that it feels right and good.

I also know that happiness is a choice.

Here are 3 ways to dump your own head trash and claim your happiness now… try ‘em out – let me know how it goes, okay?

#1 Discover Your Life Purpose (NOTHING−nothing, I say!−is more important.)

Give your life purpose a title that makes you feel exquisitely aligned with your true self every time you say it. Then, go live it!

Viktor Frankl survived Auschwitz by focusing on the good he could find, rather than the evil. He went on to change history. His book, Man’s Search for Meaning, essentially says, “Find your purpose and do it.” That’s it. That’s all you really need to do. Stop expecting to be rewarded for it or for life to bend to your will−that’s not the point. Do it for the love of it. Life owes you nothing. Give your all to life and feel the freedom that comes with self-liberation.

#2 Hell Yes To Your Intuition

As a friend once told me, “If it’s not a ‘hell YES!’ it’s a ‘hell NO.’” I now know that all I have to do is follow my clear intuitions and let all the other chatter in my head go bye-bye. It’s taken 43 years to make this a solid habit, but I tell you, it works out every time career-wise, financially, romantically when I follow the ‘hell yes.’ When I ignore the red flags, pain usually follows. Mind-numbing pain. Another friend describes this as crawling across broken glass on your lips. Pay head to your gut intuitions and be brave: say it, do it, face it, give it. Stop making excuses. It’s boring. And no one cares anyway. Give people something to care about by offering your best and find that you are happy for no reason most days.

#3 Bring Happiness To Others (It’s Your Responsibility!)

Have you noticed that happy people seem to create happiness around them (as well as opportunity)? Did you know that our negative moods are many times more impactful on others than our happy moods? I see this effect when I’m teaching. When I am struggling to find my happy place, it brings the whole class energy down. My mantra for 2012 is: “It is my responsibility to be happy in any and all circumstances. My well being and that of others depends on my good attitude.”

When I got divorced, people offered sympathy. While any ending brings with it grief, there was nothing to be unhappy about. My former husband and I are better off, not worse off. We honored our intuition in being together and we honored it in the ending. His business is soaring and I am finally stepping into the spotlight, a major piece of my life purpose that I’ve only dabbled with until now. As a master mind buddy said to me, “Um, Baeth, how are you going to bring the power of the life purpose message to millions if you’re not famous?” Right. Check. I get it. Rather than ‘seek’ fame, I’ve avoided it.

How did the spotlight show up for me to share the message? I finally decided it was time and the opportunities started showing up. Mind you, I have 13 years of expertise in my field and I am camera-ready after years on the stage. It’s discipline meeting opportunity. (That’s bonus tip #4.)

Recent Annual IASHA Meeting: members making new hand prints to kick off 2012! Photo © 2012 Russ Street

What a week! The YourPurpose.com team witnessed 30 IASHA members recommit to their Life Purposes publicly as they exuded enthusiasm, awe and love! There is a profound new energy of urgency and passion in the air. Can you feel it?

At our recent annual IASHA (International Association for Scientific Hand Analysis) meeting, some of our members made the trek to meet live and in-person in Los Angeles, California, to learn new hand data and forge deeper relationships. For our IASHA members who have been reading hands with passionate continued devotion, they received their Level One Certification for understanding how to identify Life School, Life Lesson and Life Purpose plus over 100 pairs of hands read. Bravo to our new graduates!

During the meeting, Pamelah Landers, my co-leader, and I, did live *hot seats* for each member, combining Life Purpose with Gift Markings from the hands. This led to some extraordinary downloads. What I didn’t expect was for the members to return the favor for Pamelah and me! It was a stunning revelation to discover how we are seen by others – and what is possible when we allow in and truly RECEIVE the gifts others have to offer.

I discovered something extraordinary about my own hands that may be of use to you in using your own gifts. I’ve tried to crystallize what I discovered in three simple steps. 

1. Is your Life Purpose complicated or simple?

Of course, you’ll need to have a hand analysis session to be able to answer this question with technical accuracy. My Life Purpose is “simple’ because all of my fingerprints are the same, except for one. Your Life Purpose is contained in your fingerprints, which do not change. The lines in the hands can and do change over time.

My Life Purpose is essentially Love + Spiritual Teacher + some “Business” (that solo fingerprint I mentioned earlier) thrown in for good measure. So I’m on Earth to Teach People the Business of Love. I’ve been told over and over again I am here to carry and share the “Christ” energy. When I heard that, I said, “Christ?! You’re kidding, right?”

My clients tell me, my mentors, my parents, my sister, my team, blah, blah, blah. I keep saying, “You’re kidding right?” They say “No, we’re not.” Hey, I may sometimes think I’m the second coming but now my hands confirm it. Ha ha! Hey, we have to have some blasphemy here or I will jump off a bridge from this responsibility! Christ, if he can hear me, is laughing. He was no dummy!

Of course, I’m not the only person who is here to carry this energy!!! My hand analysis co-leader and co-facilitator, Pamelah Landers, as well as a good number of my clients, have similar fingerprint patterns and are charged with the purpose of stimulating and reviving LOVE on planet Earth in all of our dealings, from the personal to the public, from the minor to the major. Maybe you are given this purpose, too?

Then again, you may have a complicated Life Purpose, made up of many different components, such as our VIP Mentoring Client, Susan Jacobi, who shares her testimony in today’s issue. Her Life Purpose is “Successful Visionary Messenger in the Spotlight.”

If you have complicated purpose, like Susan (you can read up on her complex purpose in our Client Raves section) - lead with your complexity. AIM for a big, complex problem to solve or you will be quickly bored. If you have a simple purpose, lead with simplicity so you and your clients don’t get overwhelmed. 

2. How MANY Gift Markings do you have?

I have 12 gift markings and Pamelah has 13 – out of a possible 18! Most people have NONE. Our clients typically have two or more, with about 20% of our clients matching the general populace, with none. Now, before you get your knickers in a knot about whether or not you have gift markings, keep in mind that Steven Spielberg and many other accomplished people also have zero gift markings. People with few or no gift markings lack the distractions gifts can cause and thus, can move rapidly toward their goals.

Good news? You are gifted. Bad news? You are scattered, because if you don’t use your gifts, the gifts exact penalties. For example, if you are called to the spotlight to experience fame and fortune in the arts but you don’t get your gift out there, you will stay paralyzed by the fear of rejection and your stage-time will pass you by.

1. Simple Fingerprints; Complex Palm: If you have a simple Life Purpose and lots of gift markings, like me, you need to lead with your simplicity and find simple ways for your complexity to flow. For myself, doing hot seat mentoring, live speaking and channeling are the best avenues for my complexity to flow out. I lead with a simple offer and then the complexity reveals itself once you are in my hot seat of love!
2. Complex Fingerprints; Complex Palm: If you have a complex purpose and a lot of gift markings, complexity is the rule – you will do well solving governmental, ecological, or sociological issues that are occurring on a mass scale.
3. Simple Fingerprints; Simple Palm: If you have a simple purpose and few to no gift markings, simplicity in all things is the rule.
4. Complex Fingerprints; Simple Palm: And if you have a complex purpose and few to no gift markings, put forth a complex, BIG mission and solve it for people with step-by-step programs and services. Ali Brown, creator of the Online Success Blueprint Program is a great example of this. She has a complex purpose, “Visionary Mentor and Healer in the World Community Spotlight,” yet her offerings are genius in their simplicity. She leads with her complex mission to help empower women entrepreneurs worldwide, yet is able to do it in a simple way with easily to follow programs. Her fingerprints are complex and her palm markings are clear and straightforward, just like she is! 

3.    Use Your Gifts – Using the BEST Business Model for YOU!

No matter how many gifts you have, I recommend you write down three things you just LOVE doing. Personally, I love dancing, channeling and shamanism. I have realized that if I use my gifts to do the things I love, I can incorporate that into my spiritual teaching business with great ease, rather than doing what I think I “should” do.

The issue I see for many entrepreneurs in the healing arts is that they compare themselves to what others are doing without accounting for the above simplicity/complexity dynamics. If you are a simple fingerprint/simple palm person and attempt a complex fingerprint/simple palm approach, it will feel ‘off’ to you and you will likely blame yourself for the failure, rather than having your business model support your natural style and approach to life.

Your Purpose Mentor’s Challenge: First, determine if you have complex or simple fingerprint patterns and palm markings. Then, work with your mentor to create a business model that suits who you are, rather than what you see is working for others. It will only work for you if it matches with how you are wired by nature! ]]> http://blog.baethdavis.com/use-your-gifts-or-lose-them/feed/ 0 http://blog.baethdavis.com/an-ode-to-compassion-and-3-ways-it-can-help-your-biz/ http://blog.baethdavis.com/an-ode-to-compassion-and-3-ways-it-can-help-your-biz/#comments Tue, 17 Jan 2012 14:29:44 +0000 Baeth http://blog.baethdavis.com/?p=910 Continue reading →]]> By Baeth Davis, Your Prosperity Purpose Mentor

Baeth showing off the body paint work of the artist, Amir,
Venice, California, Dec. 2011

“Put your hands up.” In ancient palmistry lore, when someone shows you their hands, they have nothing to hide. What you see is what you see. It was also thought to be an offering of compassion from a spiritual leader to his or her community. (I was not thinking about any of this when the picture was being taken. I was thinking about how cool those Hebrew letters looked on my hand and chest.)

Compassion for myself is a strong aspect of my Life Lesson — emotional authenticity.Compassion for others is fairly easy (except when it’s not); I can see people struggling daily to find health, wealth and happiness as well as their passion, their purpose and their own peace of mind.

“Passion” means to suffer for what you love, “compassion” means to recognize that suffering in another.

While attending a dance workshop in Australia with my beloved teacher, Jo Cobbett, she asked the students to write about compassion. I share what I wrote with you today and then some ideas about how compassion might factor into your business.

“Compassion… is a lost wax method, requiring the hollowing out of the SELF to be filled with the sense, the implication, the knowledge of another, to have one’s outer shell chipped away, melted and reformed into something stronger, shinier, grander than what was.

Humility comes close sister to her brother, Compassion, which means “with passion.”

Compassion is not sycophantic nor is it always sweetness; compassion is the force of feeling – of wax melting away into liquid metal, the alchemical elixir of the Gods and Goddesses.

Compassion is the greatest of all healers, having total understanding for the depth of someone else’s unknown, as deep as my own, maybe much much much deeper.

So much that can’t be solved with words. More often, through the dance, wordless form moving through space, such love, such feeling, such force of gentleness. I see myself in another. And feel the other – unconditionally. And know that, for a moment, at least, there is the unity of energy matching energy, finding an even level, harmonizing. Delicious, exquisite one-ness. Known. With compassion.”

If you consider turning toward yourself and your business with compassion, what arises in you? Are you allowed to say “easy does it” and take a break? Have some fun? Remember the moment?

1. Compassion for … Change.

Perhaps what once worked no longer works. Every industry is changing due to a revolving door of technological innovation, staff restlessness and advances by competitors. (According toFast Company, three mobile phone companies dominated in 2005. Just six years later, those companies are out of play and the mobile phone industry is led by Samsung and Apple.)

Your business model doesn’t work. Then you find one that works. For a while. Until it doesn’t. And then you need to find another model, and another and another. This is the world we now live in. The industrial age bowed to efficiency but abhorred flexibility. Today you must be quick and nimble. Have compassion for yourself if you find all this change dizzying.

I suggest writing down the three things you are great at. And then ask how you might use technology to share your greatness with others. Brainstorm with a few business associates. Take it further.

2. Compassion for … Your Client.

 Have you climbed inside the mind of your client? What is keeping them up at night? Money worries? Stress-related health issues? A chronic illness? An ailing parent? A challenging marriage? A special-needs child? A desire for something new, exciting and transforming to transcend the boredom that has overcome their life?

Choose ONE issue that many of your clients struggle with. How could you combine your three great talents, technology and their need for a novel solution?

Can you feel love and respect for your clients? Or do they wear you out? Do you always speak of them with esteem and regard? Do you strive to give them what they need – while still remembering yourself? Find out what they need – or even better - what they don’t even know they need but they truly want - and provide it to them!

3. Compassion for … Your Competition.

There is so much hype everywhere, who knows what to believe? And if you are struggling with finding your business model or giving your clients what they most desire, you may feel you are somehow flawed, stupid, slow, damaged, or just not getting it. And then you may feel pressured – ‘if I don’t adapt quickly enough, I’ll be left in the dust.’ (Remember, self-compassion first and always!)

Here are my thoughts on ‘competition.’ First of all, I do agree with Doreen Virtue: “There is no competition for your life purpose.” Only you can be you. There is only one of you. As Oscar Wilde said, “Be yourself. Everyone else is taken.” The awareness of your fleeting magical presence on Earth ought to provide you with some relief. “Do You” to your best ability and call it good. If you didn’t do your best, well, do better tomorrow.

As for competition in the marketplace, it is real, it complicated and it can come and go. Sometimes, one business dominates an industry - Apple is having their run right now. Even if they last as long as the Roman Empire, it’s unlikely they will last ‘forever.’ Nothing does.

You may open your pond to too many fishermen and get fished out, being too generous granting access to anyone and everyone who requests your help. (Do you remember compassion to yourself first?!) If so, shore up your banking, and invite in new fish that you can feed with care and love. “Protecting your pond” is just smart business. If you do decide to let others in to fish, ask yourself:

1) is this opportunity good for my clients?;

2) is this opportunity good for my business?

If you don’t get a ‘yes’ to both, pass on the opportunity.

Most of all, remember yourself in all you do and have compassion for the person you are and are becoming. In this community of healers, artists, spiritual teachers and service-minded entrepreneurs, we are notorious (and not in a good way) for putting everyone – our partner, kids, friends, clients – in front of our own needs. The entrepreneurs I see flourishing have a much easier time saying the following:

“This is, ultimately, MY business. I will design this business first to suit my personality, values, and lifestyle preferences. I will deliver client experiences through my products, programs and services that delight me and leave the client feeling good, even ecstatic about their interaction with my company. I make sure that I ways do what is best for my own well being first, so I can serve others well. My company is profitable in a way that serves me, others and then the world.”

Your Purpose Mentor’s Challenge: Journal about your degree of compassion toward yourself first. Pick three areas in your life you feel ashamed of and ask what compassion could do to turn around your attitude. Then journal about how change, competition and your clients are affecting you, positively and negatively. What would compassion, mixed in with some curiosity, courage and creativity, do for your business today?

Poster Baeth created for a 7^th grade history project. The document is still in her possession

When people first heard what I did for a living, they laughed. When they heard how much money I made doing what I do (scientific hand analysis, commonly known as ‘palm reading’), they stopped laughing. They either turned away in a daze or started asking me, “Baeth, how did you do this?”

When I tell people how I created my business, most can’t believe it’s that simple or that it requires focus, determination and work. They want a magic pill. Oh well, I can’t give you that, but I can share my experience.

It all started in the 7^th grade when I did a report on palmistry. My dad encouraged me as he read a palmistry book by the palmist, Cheiro, and he did little palm readings for his friends at parties! You can see the poster board above that I created for my presentation and still have in my possession today. My desire was there when I was a mere 11 years old. It hasn’t gone away.

The things you loved as a child are your soul’s passion calling to you. Are you willing to let go of what’s ‘safe’ to have what is true?

Jump to the present. Here are the YourPurpose.com business goals for 2012:

1. Grow our prospective client base by 10 times with new YourPurpose.comcommunity members
2. Serve current clients with excellence
3. Gross 2.5 million or more in revenues over and above our 2011 revenues (Our revenues in 2011 were UP over 2010 – in THIS economy. Imagine.)

Why do I tell you this?

People still constantly – I mean, constantly – ask me how I turned ‘palm reading’ into profits. Profitability doesn’t just happen by praying to God or just thinking about what you want to create or just writing it down. It is more than that – all though faith and intention helps the process flow much better than if you are doubtful, cranky and resistant. Obviously, right?

Here’s my manifestation process:

1. Visualize your outcome – work backwards from your goal.
2. Believe in yourself. No one else will if you don’t. Self-confidence is vital.
3. Make a plan. Research it. Write it all out – in as much detail as you can manage. Share it with those who will be instrumental in helping you achieve your goal. For example, to reach our revenue goal, I divide our annual goal by 12 for our monthly goal, then our monthly goal by 4 for our weekly goal, then divide our weekly goal by 5 for our daily goal – excluding weekends. [Do YOU know how much you need to bring EACH working day to reach your goal? If not now, when?]
4. Eliminate distracting people, places and things from all your environments – closets, car, office, bedroom, etc. (Um, hopefully there are no people in your closets or your car trunk.) My rules: make a plan daily and check things off the list, kindness is non-negotiable, and the customer is always right, except when they are obnoxious, then we block their IP address, never to be heard from again. Why? There is NO excuse for abuse. Ever. From anyone. If you expect respect, you will get it. Be sure to give it.
5. Choose a positive attitude, no matter your circumstances. Victor Frankl, Holocaust survivor and author of Man’s Search for Meaning, one of the most influential books of all time, said that attitude is the only thing no one can take from you. And he beat the Nazis. Remember that.
6. Implement. The most successful people I know are always asked, “What is the #1 key to success?” Answer “take action.” DO it. The word “do” is in the word D-O-N-E. My favorite word.
7. Track, test and measure your results. What is your home page conversion from visitor to opt in? What are your best-selling programs and products? Who purchases from you most frequently? If you don’t know, find out and watch your profits soar when you adjust based on the numbers.
8. Marketing is math. Enough said.
9. Ask for the sale. “Heart-based” selling is selling. It just means that you actually sell something and deliver, it doesn’t mean not asking for the sale or being wimpy – unless you are making money every day in your business, you are being wimpy. Sorry, but it’s true.
10. The money is in the phone. Get on the phone and ask for the sale. If you can’t sell by phone, don’t start a business. Period. Learn that ONE skill and you will blow your own mind – and see your profits do things you only used to read about. As Chellie Campbell, friend, inspiration and author of the Wealthy Spirit, says, “The money is in the phone!” 
11.  ONLY do what you love. Focus on the three things that you are great at and ditch, delegate or delay the rest. Hey, I understand the concept of html code and even used to edit my own, but I’m so unskilled, a blind monkey makes me look dumb. In the beginning, I did as much as I could to save money. Then I got on the phone and started asking for the sale, which led to success and the opportunity to hire others to help me!

Remember who you were as a child. What made you really really happy? Who did you admire? Your dream is RIGHT there. Will 2012 be the year you live honestly or will you keep making excuses for the dreary, the normal, the expected?

I believe in you. I believe in YOUR PURPOSE. Do you? I think you do. I know you do. Happy New Year!!!

Your Purpose Mentor’s Challenge: Get a piece of paper. Write down the numbers one through 11 in the left-hand column. Pick ONE big powerful goal for 2012 and write out all 11 steps. Then go do it.

If resolutions worked for most of us, we wouldn’t need to make the same ones every January first. The key of course, is to change course whenever it is time. If it’s time for a new job, new relationship (maybe with yourself!), or new body, you can make this change at any time. Question is, when it’s time to shift, do you actually shift?

Let’s back up here for a moment. Most folks I meet are bored, stuck and frustrated by life. They feel let down, disappointed and annoyed by their circumstances. This may be because, at least in Western culture, we are constantly told we are ‘not enough.’ It is how most products are sold. If you had this lotion, info-product, shoes, car, blah, blah, blah, you would be suddenly sexy, thin, charismatic and by default, incredibly rich and sought-after. It’s crap, of course, but it sells.

Why do we buy a lie? We don’t want to grow up. We wish to stay children in our magical thinking Universe, waiting for someone, anyone to pluck us from the loneliness and uncertainty of our existential existence and tell us, “It’s going to be okay and I’ll fix it for you.”

Fact is, sometimes it’s okay and sometimes it is just plain awful. I’m telling you this not to bum you out but to empower you to look at your life honestly.

This past year, I enjoyed my work more than I ever have before. The programs and products we offered came from my core passions and talents. I feel our business is attracting a wide range of dedicated, compassionate, talented people. It was a great year creatively.

Financially, I made a lot of money (particularly amazing to me in this economic time of change). Or rather, I grossed a lot of money. I also got divorced. That was expensive (so many expenses – had to find a new place to live, new office, lawyer’s fees – you get the idea) so I didn’t net a lot of money. And the house I got married in burned to the ground in a massive forest fire that destroyed hundreds of thousands of acres and cost millions in damage. Humorous perspective? We always wanted to tear that house down and rebuild so nature did it for us!

On the upside, my former husband is still one of my best friends and he and I are going to roll out a program to help you jump start your life purpose-driven business in the near future. Divorce is challenging in the best circumstances. For me, I made a choice to have minimally no outer drama, but oh, did I cry myself to sleep many many nights and journal out my confusion until my fingers were blistered (really).

2011 saw me dancing again nearly three times a week, spending more time with my sister and close friends, writing, hiking and traveling. 2011 helped me understand that I don’t know very much about the future. Despite my plans, life does what it wants, with or without my cooperation. And yet, it is vital to plan! I grasped that love means keeping my heart open, even when my head rambles on about the past pain or future hope.

A new friend, Paige, shared some powerful year-end reflection and year-beginning creation questions with me. She said, “I think you’ll want these. I think you’re going to want to share them. You have my permission to do so.” She was right. I invite you to take 90 minutes and write out your answers. I did last month and found the experience profoundly eye-opening and healing. (And if you find them useful, please just forward this entire ezine to anyone and everyone you think could benefit from this self-review.)

Before I share the questions, I want to share with you a simple little tactic that has transformed so many relationships in my life this past year. What upsets anyone is a lack of respect. If you are upset or someone you know is upset, take a deep breath and put your hand on your heart. Know that you or they are hurting because they feel disrespected. Ask your heart what your heart wants. (It will tell you). Then act from your heart. And most of all, just listen and repeat back what you hear the other person say. Don’t retaliate, give advice or try to fix the situation. Listen, with love. If you find yourself going into thinking, simply remember your heart. You will be AMAZED at what happens. (And sometimes, you may still fight. Forgive yourself and try again.)

I know it sounds almost hokey but it works. And remember, there is NO excuse for abuse, from you or towards you so please, always choose the high road.

And now, to you and your amazing life!

2011 Reflection Questions 

• What was the smartest decision you made in 2011?
• What one word or phrase best sums up and describes your 2011 experience?
• What was the greatest lesson you learned in 2011?
• What was the most loving service you performed in 2011?
• What is your biggest piece of unfinished business in 2011?
• What are you most happy about completing in 2011?
• Who were the three people that had the greatest impact on your life in 2011?
• What was the biggest risk you took in 2011?
• What was the biggest surprise in 2011?
• What important relationship improved most in 2011?
• What compliment would you liked to have received in 2011?
• What compliment did you receive in 2011 that meant the most to you?
• What compliment would you liked to have given in 2011?
• What were some of the influential books you read in 2011?
• What else do you need to do or say to be complete with 2011?

Creating 2012 

• What would you like to be your biggest triumph in 2012?
• What advice would you like to give yourself in 2012?
• What is the major effort you are planning to improve your financial results in 2012?
• What would you be most happy about completing in 2012?
• What major indulgence are you willing to experience in 2012?
• What would you most like to change about yourself in 2012?
• What are you looking forward to learning in 2012?
• What do you think your biggest risk will be in 2012?
• What about your work are you most committed to changing and improving in 2012?
• What is one as yet undeveloped talent you are willing to explore in 2012?
• Who would you like to get to know better in 2012?
• What brings you the most joy and how are you going to do or have more of that in 2012?
• Who or what, other than yourself, are you most committed to loving and serving in 2012?
• What one word or phrase would you like to have as your theme in 2012?

Mentor’s Challenge: Answer the year-end reflection and year-beginning creation questions in a quiet, beautiful location. Treat yourself to a simple pleasure as a reward for completing this important task in your self-discovery journey.

If you want BIG Transformation and Support in 2012, please consider our S.L.A.M.M. program. REGISTER HERE for our educational webinar about the program.

This past weekend, I attended a magical leadership retreat at Canyon Ranch, hosted by Stedman Graham, and featuring some of the top thought leaders, speakers, CEOs and executives in the U.S. It turns out that real leaders don’t want followers — they seek authentic leaders.

Today, we’ll explore 5 key ways you can be a leader who ATTRACTS other leaders

Do you: 

1) regularly create what my former VIP client, Renee Shatanoff, affectionately refers to as ‘time to think?’

2) surround yourself with people who are smarter, faster, healthier, more athletic, more successful and more talented so you don’t stagnate?

3) choose growth as your personal educational style?

4) feel, express and embody love?

5) practice “Genshai?”

Time To Think

In his November 2011 newsletter, Dan Kennedy wrote: “In any case, the best advice I have is to insist on some time everyday to think bigger, broader, creatively, beyond the swamp, and make some progress toward positive goals.”

Nowhere is this type of broader thinking more possible than at a place like Canyon Ranch, whose tagline is “The Power of Possibility.” If you don’t make time to think, you will either fall in the swamp, get stuck in the swamp or be drowned by the swamp. Not pretty.

Arriving on property at 10:50 am, I went to my room to make a client call and get some work done before my intentionally scheduled ‘time to think’ process began. At 3:30 pm, I headed out and received a phenomenal head, neck and shoulder massage followed by a Watsu treatment, which is essentially weightless shiatsu in a heated pool. Divine floating bliss. I wouldn’t recommend it if you have trouble surrendering yourself into the arms of a stranger (in this case, an Earth Angel named Darcy) while wearing a bathing suit. Personally, I was only aware of the sensation of my breath, my body floating and the water. At several points during the treatment, I could have sworn there were two people in the water stretching me and swirling me through the pool. A nearly full moon came out to greet us as the treatment ended with the moon beaming down on my heart.

These two body treatments allowed my restless body, tired from weeks of traveling, to rest and my mind to quiet. No deep thinking can begin with a cluttered mind. You must create space so what you desire can move in.

I then met up with my BFF, Ali Brown, a brilliant entrepreneur and mentor to other leaders. We got gussied up and ventured over to the opening night cocktail party of the retreat. It was there that Stedman Graham shared his concept of “Identity Leadership” and we all introduced ourselves.

After the introductions ended, we mixed and mingled. One of the event organizers asked me to speak the following night, telling me, “Baeth, your message about soul literacy being the key to finding your purpose and being of service kicked things off in such a beautiful way and gave everyone the permission to go deeper and be more authentic in their introductions. We’d be honored if you’d speak to us tomorrow night on purpose.” I said “yes” of course. I noted that my willingness to be vulnerable in my introduction modeled a level of leadership I hadn’t allowed myself to experience until that moment. No doubt, the physical self-care earlier in the day, the time to reflect and a room full of powerful, loving people made it more possible.

More time to think was granted by this retreat format:

• Thursday: check in early to enjoy the property and its amenities
• Thursday evening: meet and greet cocktail party
• Friday day and evening: full day of speakers and master mind sessions
• Friday: group lunch and dinner
• Saturday: group breakfast
• Saturday: spa day
• Saturday: group lunch and dinner
• Saturday evening: event wrap up
• Sunday morning: group breakfast

Notice that the learning sessions are bundled so there is ample time for rest, relaxation and inner contemplation. How many times a day, week, month or year do you make ‘time to think?’

Surround Your Self with People Who Up Your Game

The great self-development leader, Jim Rohn, said that our incomes are typically the average of the five people we spend the most time with. If you take that idea further, your development quotient is likely the average of the five people who dominate your outer relationships.

Do the people in your life:

• Challenge you to be a stand for your Life Purpose?
• Encourage you to achieve your dreams and goals?
• Engage in healthy behaviors when it comes to socializing, eating and exercising?
• Pursue their own dreams and goals with passion and commitment?

During Stedman’s presentation, he pointed out that it is important to not get caught up in someone else’s vision or you will lose yourself. The whole point of ‘identity leadership’ is to find your own unique identity and become the leader of your own life. As the leader of your life, are you choosing to surround yourself with people who pull you forward, who reach down to lift you up?

Growth As a Way of Life

Stedman chose “growth” as the primary theme for our time together. If you are not growing you are stagnating. In his book, You Can Make It Happen: A 9-Step Success System, he observes that we are all given the same 24 hours each day. For the person who has found their identity and is living their Life Purpose, they can be highly selective in terms of what projects, programs, mentors, friends, social activities, books, and so on they chose to engage in. When you know clearly who you are and choose to lead your own life, you are on the way to real freedom. Growth on a daily basis is something you choose and see as a privilege.

Do You Feel, Express and Embody Love?

Stedman went on to say that LOVE is the core of a great leader. Why? A great leader pursues what they love in every area of their life and becomes a living, breathing embodiment of that love. And if you ever meet Stedman, you’ll see that he IS love. He is one of the kindest, gentlest, most truly humble men I’ve ever met. He did not come by this easily, but with discipline, commitment and focused work.

For example, let’s say that family is a priority for you. How do you express this love for your family? You could:

• take family outings and trips
• create a family legacy plan
• make time daily and weekly to sit and talk with your family members
• encourage learning by taking your children to a museum, the opera or the theater every week
• help your kids find their true passions and support those passions with appropriate mentors, tools, books, etc.

In our 2012 S.L.A.M.M. program, we will cover 12 areas of your life, three every quarter, and help you determine how you are maximizing each life area and living that part of your life with love. This type of planning and focus can make the difference between living your daily 24 hours the same way over and over again, or doing things each day that support and nourish what you truly love.

Genshai

One of our speakers, Kevin Hall, author of Aspire: Discovering Your Purpose Through the Power of Words, brought forth the word “genshai.” Genshai is an ancient Hindi word that means you should NEVER treat yourself or another person in a manner that makes one feel small.

Are you enough today? If you aren’t treating yourself as small, are you treating yourself as enough? As worthy? And imagine loving others as much as you love every area of your life? How would that change your interactions?

Genshai is the way of the humble leader.

Your Leadership

Have you decided to be the leader of every area of your life? Your health? Your emotional mastery? Your intellectual mastery? Your character? Your spirituality? Your romantic partnership? Your family? Your social life? Your finances? Your career? Your quality of life? Your life vision?

Will 2012 be the year you stop making resolutions and instead, make time to think, hang with the best, choose growth, express love and practice genshai?

If you want support, please consider our S.L.A.M.M. program. You can obtain a registration form from Cindy@YourPurpose.com and REGISTER HERE for our educational webinar about the program. 

Mentor’s Challenge:
Review the 5 key points raised in this article and write out your responses to each point. I invite you to be the leader of your life.